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Work In Progress…

DSC_0103Actually the person playing these is hardly a work in progress nor is his mad guitar playing skills.  It just kind of seemed like a good title as it is kind of the story of my life.  Everything is always a work in progress.

I guess ultimately that is how life always goes, though.  At least for some of us.  Everything that we want, aim for…it is always a work in progress.  Sometimes we get there and sometimes we don’t.  Some of us take that as a sign to try a different path and some of us take it as a sign to try even harder.  Me…I teeter the line. Sometimes I try harder and sometimes I change paths.  Me…I’m always a work in progress.  However, I’m realize that isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

How about you?  Do you feel you are always a work in progress?  Whatever your answer, I hope you have a beautiful day and tomorrow. DSC_0106
Montana Rose Photography

Down to the Water

SONY DSCI was actually going to say, “Down to the wire,” but I figured that didn’t make a lot of sense. I am down to the wire though and obviously in this picture I was down to the water. In a sense, I was down to the wire in this picture as well.

I took this picture my last night in Wyoming.  It was around six or seven at night, which meant that it was nine or ten back home and I had exactly one day to get back to Ohio.  Yeah…I didn’t make it home in time.  Had I had the PTO to spare, I would have just said forget it.  This always seems to happen to me.  I’m always seeming to be pushing the wire when I’m hours away from where I need to be.  That is where I am at with this move.

My planned move is here in about two weeks.  I have to be out by the end of March, but it will be easier to clean and paint if my stuff is not exactly in it. Not to mention, just easier to move around my apartment.  I am no where near ready to move and in attempts to get a jump on it, I started packing things and somehow ended up with a chaotic environment.  Probably because this apartment is actually big enough for piles of boxes, the zone, and myself.  Still, I’m getting down to the wire and need to get a move on.

What is really funny about this…seven years ago at this exact same time, I was in the exact same position as I was preparing to move here in the first place.  I know this, because Facebook decided to remind me of that with a post I posted on that day 7 years ago.  How strange; especially, since I’m going back to the same place in which I left.  Not ideal and part of me has been hoping that job changes their mind and calls me before I leave, but now it is getting too close to matter.  Everything happens for a reason and I’m just rolling with it (for now).

I’ve got some big plans for this year that I’m really excited about. If they work out that will be great and should involve some great pictures.  There are some beautiful old theaters in Chicago and I’ll only be about two hours from there.  I hate driving the I-90 (or is it the I-80…I don’t remember which just that it sucks horribly and has a ridiculous amount of toll roads), but it should be worth it for a day there and taking in a musical.  I don’t really know why I have the sudden desire to see a musical.  I never have in the past.

I also have some friends that live in Florida.  I think that I’m finally going to make the trip there.  It’s only been about 4-5 years since they moved there.  The Salvador Dalí museum is near there and I love Salvador’s work.

If I do all that, I don’t know if I will make it to go camping with the buffalo in South Dakota, but I might squeeze that one in.  I’ll be staying with my parents for a while and believe me…I’m  going to need to get away. 🙂

Anyway, I’ve got much to do today so it is time that I bid adieu.
Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.
Montana Rose Photography

Stonewalling….

DSC_0271 (3)I feel poetic and yet I cannot think of a poem.  I’m sure it will come back to me.  I could call it writer’s block, but honestly…I think that my muse has just taken a vacation.  She’ll return, she always does.  Besides it’s not like I have nothing to say.  I always have something to say.

There is a soapbox about that one, but I will digress.  You know how I feel about soapboxes; however, the funny part is…someone tried to make me feel bad about not jumping on soapboxes and ranting.  They said they didn’t feel like I was being open and true to who I was and said my way of writing was a stonewall tactic.  That person is no longer a part of my life.

I’m not the kind of person that feels the need to go around in circles with people.  If it is clear that we are just going to continue to reiterate our stances and not actually meet  a mutual ground, I get bored. It is not that I’m stonewalling, I just have no reason nor interest in continuing the conversation.  I don’t feel the need to argue with people and I don’t feel the need to listen to people bash others. I also do not feel the need to listen to someone who is just continuing the conversation to be confrontational.  That is some bad juju and I do not have time for it.  That is being true to who I am.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t really given the opportunity to defend myself, but that is okay.  At first I was angry, but then I remembered something…I’m the kind of girl that decides last minute that she’s driving thirty hours to camp out in the Grand Tetons for two days.  I’m the kind of girl that goes to see bull riders by herself and listens to strangers talk about their lives out in the middle of nowhere.  I’m the kind of girl that drives 9 hours with only a dog in tow and a baseball behind the seat to explore battlefields, waterfalls, and an island filled with horses (some of which she never-ever sees).  The kind of girl that loves Krav Maga and dancing. That chooses her campsites based off of whether or not there will be bears or buffalo roaming behind her tint (the kind of girl that really cannot bring herself to call them bison.  They’ve been buffalo since I was kid growing up in that Oklahoma town).   I’m the kind of girl that loves art, but lives for bonfires.  The kind of girl that will go to the ballet as long as she can wear her boots with her dress.  I’m the kind of girl that does speak her mind, but will not allow anyone to disrespect her for doing so.  I’m the kind of girl that runs barefoot in the rain and still likes to make snow angels.  The kind of girl that can smile at those she disagrees with and walk away from the conversation without feeling the need to justify her stance.  I’m a wild and free-spirited ball of fire. I am who I am and I’ll always be just fine.

That was a little soapboxy…I apologize.  I’ve also now forgotten where else I was going with that.  I could ramble some more, but…I should say something about the picture.  It’s pretty. It’s from Wyoming. It was at sunset. That’s about it. 🙂  Seriously, though, I really kind of love it and I hope you do too.

Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.

Montana Rose Photography

Nest it….

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What can be said about this.  It is obviously a nest. I know, I know.  You are surprised aren’t you?

What are nests?  A structure made by birds (for sake of the pictures).  Every little nook and cranny.  Every detail.  Every piece of dried grass, string, and whatever else that bird found to build it.  It is a creation, hand made (beak made) to settle down, lay eggs and raise babies until they’re ready to go out on their own.  Simple enough, but it is me…let’s make this complicated.  🙂  I kid.  I won’t make it overly complicated, but that does have me thinking.

That is exactly what life is.  Each of our lives, we can pick and choose the pieces that we use to build are own little nest.  Some of us out grow the nest and have to start over again, but so do birds.  Either way, our life and where we end up…that is on us.  We pick the dried pieces of grass and the string, the mud, and what have you.  We choose how to arrange (use) those pieces to build our structure, our lives.  We build our nest. We decide what it looks like.  We are the ones that have to make it work.  Preachy, I know and  I apologize.

My own nest is changing.  I am stopping for a layover in between here and my destination. I have to pick up some pieces to make sure that my structure is solid. It was not the original plan that I started a month or so ago.  It is even different than what it was a week ago.  We have to adjust our nest to go with the wind and my wind is constantly throwing in direction changes.  I’m good with that, though.  I also don’t know what the final product is going to look like, but I look forward to whatever it is.  Guess that is the joy of being a wild, wild child. It’s a beautiful and crazy life. Let’s do this.

Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.
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Montana Rose Photography

Wave on Wave

DSC_0599That is a song that I haven’t thought about in a long time.  “Wave on Wave” by Pat Green.

“Mile upon mile, got no direction.
We’re all playin’ the same game.
We’re all lookin’ for redemption.
Just to pray, to say the name.”

That is not the chorus, but it is the part that’s most fitting.  I’m not even sure what made that song come into mind. Like I said, I’ve not thought about it a very long time. I cannot even remember the last time I heard it.  Well, about five minutes ago, but that is only because I decided to play it.

It may be the lines, “So caught up now in pretendin’…That what we’re seekin’ is the truth.
I’m just lookin’ for a happy endin’.”

I think that is all that we are all looking for, a happy ending.  Some of the components I needed to figure out how this year was going to change, well…they have fallen in to place.  Not in the direction that I thought that they were going to go, which has caused more questions than answers.  Isn’t that always the way it goes.

A friend of mine, though, he reminded me that I’m kind of a fighter and do not give up easily. He’s right, I’ll do what I always do and that is figure it out.  I’m not bitter about the outcomes. I’m discouraged, but not bitter or angry.  It’s just the way that it was supposed to be and I’m good with that.

Anyway, waves…they’re a mystical thing, aren’t they?  They look the same, but they never really are.  They crash differently and there is always some little aspect that is different than the last. I could get all up with the philosophical thought on that, but I think you know which direction I would go and so I will spare you.

I’ve also lost my train of thought and think I will bid adieu.   Wave on wave. Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.

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Montana Rose Photography

Sitting Around

SONY DSCI don’t think any of these are duplicates. They might be. I had several from this series and I did not upload them the way that I did in the past.  If they any of them are duplicates, I apologize.

It is officially 2016 and I’m not sure what my specific goals are .  Well, other than making sure it was better than 2015.  This week has been an emotional roller coaster so I’m just kind of meh.  I suppose that is what happens when in a matter of a week a job is interested in you and then not interested in you and then suddenly interested in you again.  The old me would have told them where to go, I cannot lie.

With that said, the next month will be a huge defining moment in my life.  It can go one of two ways.  I will either be accepting a new job or I will be on the verge of making one of the riskiest decisions I’ve ever made.  I’m no longer sure which way I want it to go.  Both need to happen, but unfortunately they cannot happen at the same time.

Accepting a new job for most would not seem like a huge defining moment, but for me it is.  I’ve been working the same job for seven years. A job that allows me to work from home and not really use a lot of brain power.  This new job is in a completely different field and people’s lives will be in my hands…a lot of brain power.  Kind of huge and intimidating.  We shall see how it goes.

For now, I am just waiting around to see which way the wing  blows (I meant wind, but then I decided to leave it since I have pictures of birds in this post…I know, bad joke).

It seems like I’m always just sitting around and waiting.  Not being a fan of that, I’ve vowed to do less of that in 2016.  I’m not going to be as careless as I was in 2015, but I will be a little bit more on the brave side as far as making some seemingly risky decisions.  Decisions that I would normally plan and plan and plan for, that would probably never happen because things never-ever go as they are planned.  Those kinds of decisions.

For those that are wondering what either of these means for my photography.  Truth be told, I’m still unsure.  Photography is who I am. I write, I photograph.  It will probably be something that I always do.  However, right now I cannot full answer that question.

As for the pictures…there’s not much to say. I already had them tagged with my photography namesake and they were already uploaded to WordPress.  They just seemed fitting as well.

Seagulls are always just kind of sitting around and waiting. Waiting for their meal. Waiting for nothing. Just sitting and observing.  Sitting and relaxing.  This bridge is on the bay side and it is their favorite place to sit. I get it.  I do.

May you have an amazing 2016.  Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.

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Montana Rose Photography

Fences

DSC_0799Walls, speed bumps, dead ends, or whatever…they all seem to create obstacles.  Obstacles that make us slow down, turn around, go a different direction.  My life would be nothing if there wasn’t one obstacle after another.  I think we all feel that way at some point, though.

The major change that I had hoped for in the new year, apparently is not going to happen.  I will stay off that soapbox, because one it is a soapbox and two…as of right now it is a little bitter filled.  Still, I am trying really hard to realize that this is just merely a fence in my way.

I could climb over it, but would probably rip my  jeans.  So, I will just follow it until I find a way around it or over it.  It is what I do best, even when I do not want to.

The fence in the picture, obviously not that difficult to get over.   I’m not really sure that I understand the purpose of it more than decoration.  The horses can walk over.   People can walk over it.  There is no “Don’t enter” signs.  This fence…it isn’t stopping anything.

When I shot this picture, I had no expectations.  I was just sitting on the beach with the zone, playing around with my camera.   This was one of the pictures and I kind of like this shot.   I hope you do too.

Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.

Montana Rose Photography

Morning Light

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There she stood upon her 39th birthday
Staring at the ocean before her
So many things that led her to this point
She knew not the decision she would make

The wind was crisp against her skin
Waves cold against her feet
Sun warm against her face
Sensations as broad as the emotions she held

So much anger
So much pain
Tears upon tears
Defeat long taking over

She closed her eyes
She took a breath
The moment was upon her
She took a step

Not sure of the time that had passed
When she opened her eyes
Years had gone by
Little fingers played with hers

She looked down and smiled
Then over at the eyes that smiled back
That day never left her mind
It kept her moving forward

Had it gone the other way
Would have been the weakest choice
What she chose
Made her stronger for the moment

She looked upon the ocean
Smiled  with contentment
Life is what she had chosen
Life is what she got

Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.

Montana Rose Photography

Change

DSC_0738As the sun began to set, I sat in silence listening to the waves.  It was my last night on the island and I knew it would be my last time for quite a while.  Words I’ve said before, but words with a different meaning this time.

The girl I was when I discovered this island was no longer the girl that would be leaving the next morning.  Even the island, itself, has become a different place.

So much has changed over this last year.  I’ve changed.  Next year there are even more changes in store.  Changes that will affect my blog, my photography, and my future.  What these exact changes will be, I do not yet know.

Monday I start one of two interviews for a new job.  It is what I went to school for and I must continue to pay the bills.  If the changes sway in this direction, photography will go back to being…well, pretty much what it is now.  I do not know if I will continue to try and make a business out of it.  The blog…well, its fate is still undecided and will depend on the outcome of the rest of the year.

If these interviews are unsuccessful…well, one thought at the time. Either way, there are new adventures on the horizon and they don’t really contain too many of the old.

I have a tote full of old writings.  A fairly sizable tote. I stopped doing that long ago.  I miss doing that.  Writing the blog…well, it hasn’t been what I initially planned.

My travels may be limited, I am not sure.  I do ever so loving traveling, so it will continue to make its way into my life.

I do not really know what 2016 has in store for me. I know what I would like to see happen, but life often has its own plans.  We shall see.  What I know for sure is there is a different girl than the one that was leaving that beach and truth be told…I really am okay with that.

I appreciate all of my followers and as soon as I have some final decisions or further knowledge, you will know as well.  For now, the blog is not going anywhere, but things will change in 2016.  I’m just not sure in what direction, but that is for another day.

Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.

Montana Rose Photography

Stonewall in the Sunset

DSC_0052 (5)I am taking a chance. Posting these pics. These pictures of this man. In a time where ignorance may be bliss, but tension and controversy run high.  A man that could provoke ridicule, though, the man himself died long ago.  A man on a horse. A soldier. A General.  One on a side that raises much hate and anger. I get it, I do.

I see so much hate an anger in the world. In my Facebook feed.  People overridden with fear.  People that have been so engulfed by fear and hate that their ignorance has blinded them to facts.

Not all people are bad. Not all people are evil.  Not everyone deserves to be hated. If your friend slightly disagrees with you, it does not give you a right to be a jerk to them.  If you are going to post something, you should make sure that you are not guilty of doing the same thing.

I try so hard to collect for the homeless and the needy.  I am more skeptical about giving out money, because of a jerk that apparently truly was just panhandling. You know, as I assumed from the very large amount of money he was counting as I pulled over to give him more.  Still, I know there are still needy people out there.  Yet, so many of my own “Friends” turn up their noses at the needy and homeless.  Those same friends also ignore my effort to take clothes off their hands or to pack lunches to take to the needy and/or homeless.   Then they turn around and share or rant about how we should be helping “our own people”.  Funny how that works, isn’t it?

I guess it is the things like this that make me think about my trip to the battlefields over the summer.  So, many pictures I have been reluctant to share. Parts of myself that I am so reluctant to share, because so many seem to think that they have the right to ridicule and judge based off of “what they think they know.”  It is such a shame.

It shouldn’t be like this and we should not be allowing fear to over turn us.  We should be using it to make us stronger. I am not going to start closing people off. There are still a lot of good people out there.  I’m not going to stop living my life because of it. I travel more cautiously, but I still live.

I really just want to enjoy my life, whatever is left of it, and watch the sun set on old statues that represent a different time and place. Have a beautiful day and tomorrow.

Montana Rose Photography