This will not be a long post. It is not that I don’t have anything to say, it is that I don’t have a lot of time to say it. I meant to post it last night, but it got late and by the time I sat down to write….the eyes were getting heavy and I couldn’t focus. Excuses it what that seems like, but that is not the case.
Today I am off to Illinois to see my grandparents. It is an annual tradition to go up this time of year. They have this thing called the Decatur Celebration. Carnival, street vendors…it is kind of like their version of a county fair. We all go over though. The whole family…uncles, cousins, mom, dad…everyone. It is the one thing we’ve never really let life determine.
This year, I don’t think it would have mattered. It is crucial this year. My uncle has been battling cancer for several years now. The last year or so, when the doctor determines that he needs chemo and radiation…well, it has been pretty aggressive. He’s a fighter, but we know his days are never for certain.
Then there is my grandmother. In her eighties. She has always kind of been the glue that has held everything together. But those days are…well, they’re not for certain. She broke her hip a few years back, or fractured it. It is hard to get an accurate story of the case, but like I saw time and time again while in nursing school….the hip, the inability to move like you once did…it usually affects the mind. Hers has started to dwindled and some days she knows not who my uncles are or even what time it is. That last one may seem like nothing of importance, but one day she went to bed at 4pm, because you could not convince her it was only 4pm. Sadly, those days become more frequent.
This was not to be a post of sadness. Strangely, I’m not sad. I know that I will be when those days are finally here, when they no longer are. But for now they are still here and there is no reason to be sad. It more important to remember that they are still living and to make the most of it before they no longer are. So, regardless how much I don’t want to make the drive or deal with the same ole family gathering where I am the odd man out. It is not about me….it never has been.
I hope that you all have a beautiful day and tomorrow.
Montana Rose Photography